Tale of Two Cities Pt. 1

best & worst of times Pt. 1

“It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.” Part 1 (Epilogue to the May summary-forthcoming)

Good news first!

Benitez is gone… cheer the Messenger!

I went to see my doctor yesterday. Dr. C was impressed with how I have been able to maintain a better quality of health since the vein explosion in February. She claimed I had the best sugar levels of all her diabetic patients. I average 107 everyday. Next week I go in for some new tests. The problem is the fasting 14 beforehand, so I’ll have to do it after finals, for I don’t want to be lacking nutrients while stressed out over grading finals. She’s also going to look into trying to get my compression stockings paid for by Kaiser, which is about $80 I pay for the pair every six months and I’ve been wearing them since high school. Here is a current picture of my leg… still looks bruised but it’s a lot prettier than three months ago…

Look there’s no more bullet hole… just a depression in the leg…

By the way… this is me laying on the Ihilani beach resort… hopefully, I will collect all the best pictures from Hawaii and put them in the wedding blog entry that I will get to in a couple weeks…

So with all this good news, what’s going wrong?

The second family cat has passed away this year. Fritzy the orange tabby had a tumor in her throat. Her teeth fell out and the gums blackened. The vet put her to sleep yesterday. Thankfully, Robbie (who is now 15 years old) is still lounging around.

Also, my grandma Rosing’s health has been fluctuating and improving since my aunts arrived in the Philippines to help keep an eye on her, but they are not going to be able to stay there… my parents will likely be following soon to assist…

Here’s a copy of my aunt Shirley (yes, that auntie Shirley) update in which you get to see a serious side to her…

So where to begin?!?

Mom spent a total of nine days in hospital (4-1/2 days in ICU and another 4-1/2 days recovering in her own private room). She had "beginning pneumonia" as well as a bacterial infection in her stomach.

By the time Brenda and I arrived in the Philippines, she was on her way out of ICU, and into a private room that boasted a fridge, private bathroom, air conditioning and cable tv. On the downside, you have to bring your own toilet paper and bring your own drugs as well.

The hardest part about that hospital experience was watching Mom as she struggled while the feeding tube was inserted. I was there for the last two attempts; Carlos was there to hear her scream the first time. I imagine inserting the catheter wasn't fun either.

But the feeding tube is ESSENTIAL because without it, Mom won't eat enough to maintain her health. She was having problems swallowing, she didn't like the taste of certain foods, she didn't like using her dentures, she just wasn't eating enough.

So the feeding tube is the only answer. Sure, it doesn't look good seeing her with a tube up her nose but she needs it to survive.

She also has an oxygen tank that she uses as needed. This allows her to breathe easier, and it also gives her some much-needed energy.

Before I go any further, I have to give a lot of credit to EMMA for her devotion to our mother. She is the one who is at our mother's side day and night, who slept there in the hospital, and who is with her at home right now. At some point, the family will need to discuss hiring additional help because Emma cannot do it all, although she's very willing. There is of course Bembol, Carlos and Janet pitching in but Mom is going to need more professional care sooner than later.

The latest "scare" was a drop in Mom's blood sugar level, which we have been carefully monitoring for the last two days. Carlos is giving her fresh-squeezed orange juice and carrot juice and that is making a positive difference.

We really do have to take this day by day.

There's no doubt that Mom is a SURVIVOR. She celebrated her 87th birthday in hospital but, God willing, she and Dad will be celebrating their 70th wedding anniversary at home, surrounded by family, relatives and friends. (I imagine this will be a very small, intimate affair - as opposed to the big bash Dad wants but Daddy can't have everything... Again, I'll save talk about Dad another time, maybe even never... did I mention that he is cooperating?!?)

As I mentioned before, Mommy is STRONG and she's feisty. She also has a habit of giving Brenda and me the "pinch test" and informing us that we're plenty fat. (Thanks, Mom.) She talks to us in English, and shows her appreciation by saying "thank you" and "I love you" (when prompted!). When she doesn't remember who we are, we'll remind her, and she'll say something like "Oh, I have a daughter named Brenda (Shirley)." And when she does know our names, it is MAGIC to our ears.

I could go on and on about her medical condition, and what her doctors said, but I won't.

The important thing is that she is HERE with us today, and so we're enjoying every moment we spend with her.

In so many ways, she's like an infant again. She has to be fed every four hours; her diapers unfortunately need changing more times than that.

But, hey, wasn't she there for us when we needed her as babies, as children, and later as adults?!?

We should be thankful that she's being well taken care of here in the Philippines. So, if you want to spend some quality time with her, book that flight and show her you love her. Shower her with kisses and hugs even though she might whack you back for showing too much affection!

And if you can't, that's okay too because there are plenty of us here who'll deliver your hugs and kisses for you. (The last thing I want to do is make anyone feel guilty. We all have our reasons and we all have our own separate lives.)

One last sobering thought: After spending nearly two weeks here now, I have come to the realization that our mother is alive because we can AFFORD to keep her alive. At some point, we'll have to let her go, but until then, we'll cherish her and let her know how deeply she is loved.

If there is anyone I've forgotten to include on the Distribution List, please kindly forward to them. Thank you.

Peace,

Shirl